Last Saturday night, I had my supper sitting on my little kitchen table, steaming in lusciousness like supper will do. My cat, Angelique, is about 8 years old and blacker than night, with the exception of two glowing green eyes and a little white spot on her chest. I decided to convert her from being an outside cat to an inside one since I will soon be married and my fiance and I want a pet.
Normally, she doesn’t have trouble following directions. She was litter-box trained her first night. She’s very smart, despite the fact that my brother keeps jabbing at me, that cats’ brains are the size of a walnut. A lot goes on in that little furry cranium!
This became obvious to me as I realized that the smell of my supper was permeating the room, and her Majesty the Cat was sitting pretty at my feet.
I could see the wheels turning already. When she comes into our house, I won’t want her on the tables or the counters. I mean, who likes cat hair in their food? And BLACK cat hair? Gross. I won’t even let her put her paws on the table. I’m such a mean mom.
Looking on the table, I saw that I didn’t have the water sprayer bottle there like I usually do, since I sometimes use it to wet down my hair. I could see her ambitions already, so I excused myself for two seconds to go and grab it.
It was only like two feet away!
I turn around, and Her Royal Majesty is already on the table, with her whiskers hovering over my food. It was like one of those old cartoons where the sneaky character has it’s mouth open and is just ready to bite into someone’s meal, and then their eyes travel up to meet the angry person who discovered them.
I was shocked at how fast she was! But she wasn’t fast enough for me.
Okay, I know she’s a drama queen, but I didn’t know she could be an acrobat, too! She jumped like two feet in the air and did some sort of awkward flip, then landed on the corner of the table. And stared at me.
Then she glanced at my food.
So I squirted her again, unable to control my laughter.
I hope this isn’t animal abuse. She was still on the table…
She cried again, but this time she couldn’t get off the table fast enough. She spent the rest of the night sulking under the bed because she got caught.
And I chuckled as I ate my supper. I almost wanted her to try it again, so I could tape her doing a back flip and send it in to America’s funniest home videos. I could have won money for Angelique’s amazing acrobatic skills.